


Happily Ever After...?

by guns_and_gauntlets (CynicalMistrust)



Series: Tales of Claims [2]
Category: Tales of Xillia
Genre: ALL THE ANGST, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Angst, Doubt, Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-09
Updated: 2016-10-20
Packaged: 2018-08-20 11:05:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,947
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8246603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CynicalMistrust/pseuds/guns_and_gauntlets
Summary: Set five years after Cave of Wonders - Jude starts to doubt the sincerity of his one-sided claiming with Alvin.





	1. Chapter 1

“Ju~de! You’re back. You’re going to tether with me today, ri~ght?”

Jude glanced up as Aska invaded his personal space, chuckling as he rubbed the spirit’s beak. “Sorry Aska, you know I can’t.”

Aska tsk’ed, pulling back with a huff. “And why not? Because of your so-called omega? I don’t see any claiming marks on you. I promise you’ll enjoy it. C’mo~n, just for a bit.”

Jude frowned, glancing away and moving to pick up the stack of research papers he’d come for. “Why does it matter if I have a mark or not?”

“Oh Jude, so innocent. If you were _my_ alpha, you wouldn’t be seen without my mark.” Aska huffed again, preening his feathers and eyeing Jude over a wing. “Obviously your omega doesn’t care enough to stake a claim.”

“That’s enough, Aska,” Jude said, sighing and rubbing at his forehead. “I’ll see you later.” He turned and left before Aska could say anything else to worm further under his skin.

He flipped through the papers on his way back to his office, but he didn’t see anything he hadn’t expected. Spyrite technology was stable enough the tests were more or less a formality at this point, but now that they were being mass-produced, he didn’t exactly have anything else to do.

Six years he’d given to his research, but his goal had finally been achieved. Balan and Gaius both ensured proper companies were in place to assist with production and distribution, and he was sure his last request for funding hadn’t even been read before the gald flowed in; spyrites were too long in the making for the plug to be pulled now.

He dropped into the seat at his desk and glanced around. There was nothing he had to do, just like yesterday and the day before. He’d made the breakthroughs, ensured the spyrites worked as intended for both humans and spirits, and now… it was out of his hands unless something went wrong. Which it wouldn’t. They’d spent a solid six months testing what they’d intended as the final product with no issues.

“Now what…?” he murmured, slumping back in his cushy chair. He wasn’t even twenty-five and he’d accomplished what felt like his life-goal. He could go back to Fenmont, finish his doctoral training, get a proper degree, but he had a home here. With Alvin. At least he thought he did. He rubbed at his neck where there was a distinctive lack of a mark. They’d been together five years and Alvin had never shown any real interest in marking him back, or even... topping in the bedroom.

He felt his face warm at the thought and shook his head. Sure, Alvin could be demanding and even forceful when he wanted to be, especially if alcohol was involved, but when it came down to it, he never tried to make good on the teasing threats to take him in return. It wasn’t like he minded either way, the sex was always good, but… what if… Alvin was only still with him because he’d marked him in that cave?

Alvin had insisted for months whenever he asked that it was good, that it was what he wanted, but a lot had changed the past few years. Elympios finally had a secure future,Alvin's business was flourishing, and now Jude was...what? Still just a kid in Alvin's eyes and soon to be jobless, he was sure. Balan wouldn't get rid of him, but there was only so much he could do in the lab now. Outside of seeing the patients using spyrites,he was basically obsolete.

He sighed again, pushing to his feet and taking the papers to Balan’s office.

“Ah, Jude, you're still here? Is something wrong?”

“No, I was just about to head home.”

Balan took the papers with a nod. “It's late, you should get some rest. Why don't you take a few days off?”

Jude was about to decline as always, used to the offer coming every few weeks, but stopped. “Yeah, maybe I should…”

Balan looked up in surprise. “What? Really? Are you sick?”

“No! I'm fine, promise. I just... I'm kinda tired now that it's slowed down.” He rubbed the back of his neck, feeling guilty for taking time away, but he felt like it was the right thing to do.

“Good. Take all the time you need. Finally get Alvin off my back about keeping you hostage.”

“What?”

Balan waved a hand dismissively and set the papers aside. “Nothing, nothing. Enjoy yourself.”

Jude frowned but didn't push for more. “Thanks…” He turned to leave, heading back to his office for his personal notebooks and jacket. It was too late to get dinner anywhere and he just hoped there was something edible in the apartment.

He caught what he was sure was the last train and breathed a soft sigh of relief. Even after all these years he wasn't used to the schedule. Sometimes he lost track of time badly enough he ended up sleeping in his office rather than risk having to trudge back after finding the trains had closed.

By the time he got to the apartment, he really was exhausted. He dropped his things on the table and collapsed on the empty bed, too tired to bother with food.

He cracked his eyes open some time later as he heard the door, staring at the clock with bleary eyes. Almost three in the morning. He sighed, closing his eyes again. It wasn’t long before Alvin stumbled into the room, cursing under his breath as he undressed, finally falling onto the bed with a muffled groan.

Alvin shifted his way up to press against Jude’s back, nuzzling at his neck. “Y’awake?”

Jude shivered, torn between wanting to go back to sleep or giving in. “No.” He cursed softly as Alvin’s hand slid between his legs, though it quickly turned to a groan as his body betrayed him. He rolled over, grimacing at the stench of alcohol on Alvin’s breath. “You went to the club with Ludger again.”

Alvin hummed an affirmative, pressing his face into Jude’s neck. “Starting to think that kid’s gay,” he murmured.

Jude snorted quietly, stretching out beneath Alvin and offering up more of his neck, hoping tonight might be the night Alvin finally marked him. He closed his eyes as teeth scraped along his neck, holding his breath. A moment later, snoring filled his ear.

He sighed, staring at the ceiling as disappointment killed what little arousal he had. He shifted beneath Alvin, nudging him onto his back. His fingers found their way into the slicked-back hair, returning it to its usual controlled mess. Aska’s words came back to him and he pulled his hand away, doubt creeping into his mind.

He curled up on his side, watching Alvin sleep before the pang in his chest eased enough he drifted off himself.

The smell of food roused him hours later. His stomach rumbled and he stretched, panic spiking through him as he saw what time it was. He scrambled out of bed, half dressed before remembering he was taking the day off.

He cursed and rubbed at his face, stumbling into the bathroom. By the time he made it to the kitchen, he didn't care if Alvin burned everything, he'd still eat it. He grabbed the carton of juice from the fridge and shook it, deciding there was just enough for a glass and drinking straight from it.

Alvin glanced at him in amusement, nursing his cup of coffee as he scrambled the eggs. “Aren't you going to be late?”

“Taking the day off,” he replied, blinking as Alvin looked disappointed.

“Wish I'd’a known, I wouldn't’ve made an appointment to meet with a new client today.” He sighed, scooping the eggs onto two plates. “Hey uh...last night... I didn't _do_ anything, did I?”

Jude took his plate and snorted quietly. “You passed out,” he said, sinking into a chair at the table. The way Alvin looked so relieved quelled his appetite, but he forced a few bites at least, pushing the rest around on his plate as the doubt returned.

What if Aska was right? Claiming usually went both ways, didn't it? Both his parents had marks. Maybe Alvin was just waiting for a good time to bring up that he'd found someone else. He'd been going out a lot lately. Maybe he and Ludger...

“Jude?”

He looked up, meeting Alvin's eyes a moment before looking back to his plate. “Hmm?”

“...Not hungry?”

He shook his head, taking another bite and blinking against the stinging in his eyes. Why was Alvin even still here? It wasn't like him to stick around somewhere he really didn't want to be; he'd pulled enough disappearing acts to prove that. Or was it the mark? He'd heard how it could make it difficult to be separated from the one who'd marked you… Maybe he needed it removed first, but couldn't ask for it? He nearly dropped his fork at that thought.

“Hey, snap out of it!” Alvin grabbed his shoulder and shook it.

Jude looked up in surprise, sucking in a breath past the tightness in his chest.  

“Jude what the hell? Your scent’s all over the place. What's wrong?” Alvin shook him again, crouching next to him and brushing back Jude's hair.

Jude swallowed hard, trying to reign in his emotions and control his scent. It should have come easy after controlling it at the lab all day every day, but it took several deep breaths before he was able to breathe normally again.

“Are you happy here Alvin?” He flinched as Alvin pulled away, his stomach plummeting.

“What? Why are you asking- is this about last night?” Alvin stepped back, hands clenched. “Look, I know I've fucked up sometimes, but are you really kicking me out _now_?”

“I'm not kicking you out.” _Just giving you your chance to leave._

“That's not-” Alvin cursed as his GHS went off, pulling it out to answer it. “What?” he snapped. “Now’s really not a go-... Why can't you handle it? I'm kind of in the middle of- Dammit, Yurgen!” He snapped the phone shut and looked like he was about to throw it against the wall before shoving it back in his pocket.

Jude glanced up with a forced smile. “Go,” he said, standing to clean up the dishes. Their jobs always came first, it was an unspoken agreement. Only now that his was in limbo, he found he wanted more. How was he supposed to ask that of someone who didn't want to be there to begin with?

He tensed as Alvin wrapped his arms around him, breath catching as lips ghosted along his neck. “I'll be back in a few hours. Get some rest.” His heart sank as Alvin pulled away without his usual kiss. “I'll bring dinner from that Rieze Maxian place you like,” Alvin called before the door closed behind him.

Jude dropped the plates into the sink as the silence crept in on him. _Obviously your omega doesn't care enough to stake a claim._ He pushed away from the sink, trying to ignore the words and the doubt, but they'd already taken hold and he was too tired to reason against it.

He stripped and climbed into the shower, closing his eyes as the water heated and beat into his skin. At some point he ended up on his knees, slumped into the wall, arms wrapped around himself.

He was losing Alvin; had probably been losing him for months or years and had been too caught up in his work to notice until now.

Spyrites were no longer something in the distant future. He should be happy he was done, but all he could focus on was that he didn't have a purpose anymore. And now he wouldn't have Alvin.

The overwhelming anguish choking him was the same as when he'd watched Milla die on that ship. He knew what it could do to him if he didn't make himself get up. Do something. Anything. Getting rest would be the worst thing he could do now, but he couldn't bring himself to move.

He heard his GHS go off as the water started turning cold, reaching up to turn it off before getting to his feet. Dried off. Got dressed. Checked the message.

_I'm sorry, this is going to run late._

Jude laughed and rubbed at his eyes. No point in waiting around then. He had to get out of the apartment or his thoughts would drown him. He grabbed his gauntlets and a pack, filling it with supplies before scribbling a note: _Went out._

He wasn't sure where he was going, but clearing out some monsters sounded good. It would keep his mind off other things.

The only boat in port was going to Fenmont and he hopped on board. He was tempted to stop at the medical center when he arrived, but he didn't feel like exchanging pleasantries. Instead he went to Barnauer Highroad and let his feet take him wherever.

Only a few of the monsters bothered him, most keeping to themselves, away from the path. Eventually he ended up in the Marsh, unsure what he was even looking for, just knowing he needed to find something, anything, to give him a purpose.

He passed through the area where the schism was dissolved. Even after so many years travelers could still find evidence of the battle if they looked long enough. He continued on, finding himself in the deeper part of the Marsh sometime around what would have been nightfall back in Trigleph. The monsters on the plateau didn’t give him any trouble and he moved to the edge of the cliff, tipping his head back and breathing in the fresh breeze, a touch of cool to it from the Tundra below.

His stomach finally rumbled its discontent enough he rummaged through his pack, draining a canteen of water and nibbling on a gel. Even expecting a call from Alvin, he was still surprised when his GHS went off. He barely got a word out before Alvin was interrupting him.

“Jude! Where the hell are you?”

He sighed quietly, shoving his things back into his pack and standing. “Fezebel Marsh.”

“Alone? Get out. Ludger said there’s been a posting about a new elite cat out there.”

Jude stiffened and closed his eyes. “Tell _Ludger_ I’ll be fine.”

“Stop messing around, this isn’t funny!”

A soft growl came from behind him. He didn’t hear what else Alvin had to say as he slowly turned around. A large cat reminiscent of the one they took down a few years ago crouched in front of him, this one yellow rather than blue, and it didn’t look happy to see him there.

“Jude are you listening to me?”

“I uh… I think I found that cat,” he murmured, wincing as it let out a roar. He glanced towards the path leading out and took a step towards it, hopping back when it leapt to block him. “And it’s angry… Niiiice kitty…” Alvin was screaming at him, but he wasn’t paying attention to the words. Maybe this was what was best. He’d been lead here by something, hadn’t he? “I’m sorry, Alvin.”

“Jude?!”

He saw the attack coming, instincts kicking in. He tried to dodge or Pivot, but there wasn’t enough room. The cat slammed into him and then he was sailing over the cliff, through empty air, Alvin’s fading voice screaming his name from somewhere below. He blacked out when he hit the ice-filled water and didn’t expect to wake again.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was supposed to be a two-part fic, but... they've both turned into whining angst muffins, so there will be a third.

Days turned to weeks turned to months, and still there were no signs of Jude. They’d found his pack, dangling off a withered tree growing out of the side of the cliff where he’d fallen, but that was the morning after Alvin's call ended with a roar of a now-deceased feline.

He didn't stop looking. He couldn't. Every day he trekked through the marsh or froze his ass off on the tundra, screaming his throat raw trying to find some sign of Jude. Even the few times when he was close to giving up, he just had to spend a day back in the city, with the silences and pitying looks of the others, and he was ready to be on the hunt again. There was a reason he'd never stayed put long. He couldn't stand people knowing his business, knowing _him_.

Jude was the first to be able to keep him somewhere for so long. Even Presa hadn’t lasted as long as Jude. They just...worked. Until they didn't.

He knew that was his fault; he had a penchant for ruining relationships, even if they were going well. _Especially_ when they were going well. It was only after he'd returned to an empty apartment, with the lingering stench of distress, that he remembered why Jude's scent had triggered an unease in him. It was the same acrid burn that permeated the cabin he'd found the kid in after Milla sacrificed herself.

Loss and despair.

It turned his stomach, made worse by the fact it came from _Jude_. His _alpha_. He was supposed to protect the kid, keep him balanced and happy. That was what a proper omega would do at least, though he'd given up the notion of ever being a proper omega shortly after landing in Rieze Maxia.

He stopped at the edge of the cliff Jude had fallen from, ignoring the gusts of wind tugging at his hair and jacket as he scanned what he could see below. A vast blanket of fog mostly. He took a step closer, rock crumbling beneath his foot and skittering down the cliff.

The others were starting to doubt Jude was still alive, but he knew better. His fingers drifted to the mark on his shoulder, to the faint pull of _mate_ that still lingered there, similar to, but far more subtle than a link. Jude was alive, somewhere, though either just barely or… hiding because he didn't want to be found.

It wasn't like he could blame him, even without knowing what he’d done to break the last straw. Jude was too much of a bleeding heart to kick him out, though he hadn't pegged the kid as cruel enough to just walk away either.

“Dammit, kid…” Alvin raked his fingers through his hair; it'd grown longer than usual the past months since he had more important things to do. Like walk aimlessly through areas that weren't likely to turn up any new evidence, much less Jude himself. “Where did things go wrong? Just... come back and give me a chance to make it right.”

He didn't expect an answer, just like how he hadn't gotten an answer the last hundred and eighty-four times he'd begged for another chance.

His GHS went off to spite him and he almost ignored it, but he wasn't interested in another search party on his tail if he did. If it could even be called that. Where the hell did Gaius keep finding so many ninjas anyway?

He answered with a sigh. “Yeah?”

“Alvin.” Ludger sounded relieved. “Where are you?”

“Fezebel Marsh.” He frowned as Ludger hesitated. “What's wrong?”

“Nothing’s _wrong_ … You just need to come back home, as soon as you can.”

“What? Why?”

“Just get your ass back here, Alvin! _Now_.”

Alvin stared at the device after Ludger hung up on him. Apparently he was destined to be ordered around by up-start brats. What the hell did that even say about him? That he was willing to submit to an alpha so long as they were younger than him? At least he had Spirius to blame for Ludger blossoming into a hard-ass. Or was that Gaius’ doing?

He shoved his GHS back in his pocket, fighting down the building worry that something had happened; he wasn't sure he could handle losing another of them right then. He stared out at the fog a moment longer before turning to start back towards the city.

He couldn't bring himself to call it home knowing Jude wasn't there waiting for him.

* * *

As soon as he stepped into his apartment he knew something _had_ happened. It wasn't as though every day he just happened to find his drinking buddy chatting with his… pseudo father-in-law in his living room. He was usually spared that awkwardness for the yearly “family holiday celebration”.

“The hell is going on?” He eyed Ludger with a silent promise of payback if this turned into another thinly veiled death-threat for running Jude off. With the stench of agitated alpha clawing at his senses, he doubted that was too far from the truth.

Ludger ignored the look, picking a glass up from the table and handing it over instead.

Alvin took it on instinct, staring at what looked like a few fingers of whiskey inside. Ludger’s scent shifted to cautious and...sympathetic and the hole in his gut grew until he felt like he was falling into it. “Fuck,” he breathed. “You found him…” He drained the glass and sank down on the sofa as his legs gave out. What little relief he felt was quickly snuffed out with the surety they were about to confirm they'd indeed found Jude. Dead. That it didn't matter what he felt from the mark on his shoulder, it was all just wishful thinking.

He'd killed Jude and he didn't even know what the fuck he’d said to cause it. He heard Mathis speaking, but couldn't focus on the words. He'd heard it before anyway - blaming him for corrupting his dear son and daring to get close without any intention of making an effort. Like he'd ever _intentionally_ hurt Jude.

Maybe he had. Maybe if he hadn't run away from their conversation-that-was-too-civil-to-be-a-fight Jude wouldn't have felt the need to _go out._ Wouldn't have ended up in the marsh. Wouldn't have plummeted to his death.

He didn't notice Ludger moving closer until he felt a hand on his shoulder, startled enough to focus again and find his glass refilled.

“...nonsense about mermaids is unsettling, but we can worry about his mental health when he recovers,” Mathis continued.

Alvin jerked as if slapped as those words sank in. “He's alive?”

Mathis stopped packing up his bag, slanting an almost offended look at him. “No thanks to you.”

Ludger’s fingers tightened on his shoulder and he gritted his teeth, draining his glass before struggling to his feet. “Where is he?” He glanced towards the bedroom and started towards it, ignoring them both.

Jude was alive. He was back. He was _here_.

The door was ajar and he pushed it open, scanning the room before staring at the bed where Jude was huddled in the middle, tucked in as if he were a kid. No, a patient.

“Jude…” Alvin took a hesitant step inside before stopping. It might have been a shared apartment, but he'd spent as little time here as possible the past months and tended to crash on the sofa when he did. It'd always felt more like Jude's home to him, but he'd never minded. Until now, when it felt like he was intruding just by breathing.

Both their scents had gone stale and faded from the room in their absence. The fresh scent of Jude's shampoo and antibacterial soap filled the air in their place, mingling with the harsher bite of medical ointments.

Jude watched him in silence, unmoving aside from the faint rise and fall of the covers as he breathed.

“Can… Can I come in?” he asked, gripping the door, though he wasn't sure if it was to keep himself from running to Jude or running away.

When Jude finally nodded, Alvin sagged in relief, stumbling forward and sinking into the chair someone had pulled up next to the bed.

Up close, he could see the dark shadows beneath Jude's eyes, the sunken and pale skin of malnourishment. A sling wrapped around what was visible of his right arm, what looked like bruises beneath, the rest hidden under the covers.

He started to reach for Jude's hand, but flinched away from taking it. It was too much; reminded him of sitting beside his mother knowing there was nothing he could do to fix it. He'd taken Jude for granted from the beginning, ever since the kid proved stubborn and stupid enough to give him second chance after second chance. Like Presa. And she'd died because of it.

Jude nearly found the same fate. He looked like hell and the only one to blame for it was Alvin.

“I'm sorry, kid. Whatever I did or said that made you doubt me...”

It wasn't until Jude's fingers touched his cheek he realized he was crying, flinching back and pressing a hand to his face with a choked-off sob.

“Alvin.”

Alvin took an unsteady breath, swiping his arm across his face before glancing up. “What do you need, kid?”

“Nothing. You can go.” Jude's voice was soft, little more than a hoarse whisper, but Alvin flinched as if he'd shouted.

“What? Jude I'm not leaving you.” Not again. Never again.

“‘m fine. Ludger’s waiting f’you.” He pulled his hand away and closed his eyes with a soft sigh, slumping into the pillows as if exhausted.

Drugged, rather. Mathis had likely pumped him full of painkillers, and as much as Alvin wanted to know the extent of Jude's injuries, he knew enough from the fact Jude had even taken the drugs.

He stared at Jude as he tried to make sense of his words. Why the hell would he think Ludger was waiting for him? It wasn't like he lived here. Except the others had taken it on themselves to have someone keep an eye on the place in case Jude came back. This week was Ludger’s turn.

Jude never acted like he had a problem with Ludger, though Alvin had somehow gotten closer to him than Jude had. He was a good drinking buddy and even passed him a contact once in a while to keep his business afloat. Then there'd been that month when Jude literally lived at the labs getting spyrites ready for mass production and Alvin had crashed at Ludger’s for company.

He hadn't thought much of it then, but looking back, Jude always got annoyed when he mentioned Ludger or went drinking with him after that.

Did Jude think he was... _cheating_ on him? Hurt and anger blossomed in his chest as he sat up. All of this just because Jude thought he didn't want to be with him anymore? “Ludger!” he called, glaring at Jude when he cracked his eyes open and keeping his eyes on him until he heard Ludger at the door. “Would you please explain to Jude we're not, in fact, fucking?”

Ludger grunted in confusion and Alvin saw Jude's eyes flick towards him. “I'm fucking Gaius, not Alvin,” he finally said. “And on that note, I'm leaving. There's food in the fridge.”

“Thanks.” Alvin raised an eyebrow at Jude when he had his attention back. “Satisfied?” he asked, crossing his arms and cursing himself when Jude looked away. He stood, shedding his jacket and tossing it over the back of the chair. “I never cheated on you, kid. I never even _wanted_ to.” He paced the room, raking his fingers through his hair before touching the mark on his shoulder. “Not since you left your claim.”

He turned as Jude made a soft whimpering sound, narrowing his eyes. “Jude?” He sank back down in the chair, hating what his mind was daring to circle. “Do you...regret marking me?” They'd had this conversation countless times, but it had always been him reassuring Jude he wanted it. It never even crossed his mind that… Jude never wanted this. That it had all been due to him teasing the alpha instincts in the kid.

 _Fuck_.

He didn't want to hear the answer, didn't want to even consider the possibility he'd been making Jude's life miserable the past five years. That Jude was just another notch on his belt of fuck-ups.

Jude shifted on the bed, twisting the fingers of his good arm in the covers. “Do you?”

Alvin bit the inside of his cheek as he fought the initial urge to say of course he didn't regret it. Maybe all the times he'd reassured Jude he'd actually been making it harder for the kid to say _he_ was the one who wanted out. He blew out a sharp breath, ignoring the taste of blood on his tongue. “I regret it if this isn't what you wanted…” He lifted his hand, wanting to touch Jude, but again he drew back before he could. “Look kid, I know I'm not-” _worthy, anything special, anything other than a fuck up._ He snapped his mouth shut and looked away. He wouldn't guilt Jude into wanting to be with him. He was above that. Wasn't he?

“Just tell me what you want, kid.”

“You happy,” Jude mumbled, his eyes all but closed when Alvin looked back at him.

With a sigh, Alvin stripped down to his underwear and slid under the covers next to Jude, feeling some of the tension seeping out of both of them as he carefully wrapped his arms around the alpha.

He pressed his nose into Jude's neck and closed his eyes, breathing deep. The scent of soap and shampoo was stronger, with a lingering hint of sea. He pressed closer, trying to find Jude's mint and strawberry as he wondered why he couldn't be happy with Jude.

**Author's Note:**

> I started work on this half a year ago and kinda forgot where I was going with it between my moves, but the next chapter will be better. I hope.


End file.
